life hack: be nice to people with a pool at their house
(via i-will-die-laughing)
Untitled
But not really.
whenever people i think are cute like my selfie i just start tearing up a bit
(Source: slydiggers, via iwillmindfuckyou)
those black girls who wear 74027 things of jewelry so they sound like a walking maracca
ah yes, those black girls that do that. the girls that do that that are black. thank you for specifying the race of the girls that wear the jewelery. the black ones
Someone making a white girls joke:
Someone making a black girls joke:
(via i-will-die-laughing)
SO THIS GUY IN MY ENGLISH IS DOING A PROJECT FOR BIO WHERE HE GETS A DUCKLING TO IMPRINT ON HIM SO HE JUST CARRIES IT AROUND WITH HIM TO ALL OF HIS CLASSES AND I SWEAR THIS DUCK IS THE MOST WELL BEHAVED FUCKING POULTRY IVE EVER SEEN IT JUST SITS ON HIS DESK QUIETLY AND SOMETIMES HE PUTS IT IN HIS POCKET AND IT JUST SLEEPS LIKE WOW YOU GO DUCKY
(via i-will-die-laughing)
my little brother wrote about me for school and this was one of the sentences he wrote. im sobbing “my sister is my role model because she can watch 12 years worth of law and order in 3 months”
(via iwillmindfuckyou)
My sister keeps asking me if I want to go see The Great Cosby with her and I don’t have it in my heart to correct her.
(via i-will-die-laughing)
do you ever feel like a plastic bag
No, I always feel like a Prada bag
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u know what would be cool. if you could wear whatever you wanted whenever you wanted without having to feel bad or weird or shamed about it. show up to work in plated armor. show up to a staff meeting in full cosplay. wear a dress to play tackle football. wear a bikini at the dinner table. dress in scuba gear for your wedding ceremony.
did you mean sims
(via i-will-die-laughing)
TOTALLY JUST CONVINCED MY BRITISH FRIEND THE AMERICAN SCHOOL SYSTEM USES SHARPS AND FLATS IN GRADING LIKE A-, Ab, A, A#, AND A+ AND SHE’S TOTALLY BUYING IT
YOU LITTLE SHIT
(via i-will-die-laughing)
